New Poem: Filling the Emptiness

This new poem has been written to coincide with Eating Disorders Awareness Week 2026, and it explores some of the challenges that S P Clark has faced along his journey. It deals with the subject directly. So do link on the links underneath the poem should you need help, advice and support. For more of Clark's work click here!

Filling the Emptiness

S P Clark

Written to coincide with Eating Disorders Awareness Week 2026

Loneliness had taken hold so strongly that there was no sense in life

There was no life in my senses

My reason, my rationality, my common-sense had abandoned me

I was spiralling once again down a dark gullet that I didn’t want to be in.

Grasping food as much as I wanted

As much as it told me to somewhere in the recesses of my drug-addled brain

It was insane how the thoughts took hold. BOLD CHOICE!

I had no voice aiming to stop me from filling the emptiness I felt inside

Despite the tears I cried onto the floor of my soul.

Then I stood facing myself and turned my eyes away in shame

This food is too much, it burns and I can’t take the heat of the flame burning inside like a volcano that wants to erupt

So with fingers rammed inside my tightening throat I jabbed to disrupt the digestion of junk

Look at me now, another example of someone who couldn’t debunk the myths around these disorders

Someone who is breaking away al the protective borders that help us survive.

THRIVE!

Now the control has driven me to the brink of disaster and I’ve committed the same crimes and mistakes

I’ve lied and I’ve cheated, my world flooded with fraudulent fakes that I’ve deceived myself into thinking are true

How did my world turn so scarily blue when all I ever wanted was happiness?

© S P Clark

For help and support, please visit Beat Eating Disorders, Shout, Orri, or the NHS!